11:19
insight twenty
these past two days have been some of my happiest. spending them with the best human on earth. just laughing and cuddling. making me forget everything. each kiss clearing my mind, making all my issues a thing of the past. just lying with him, being within his arms, feeling his warm with his heart beating softly against my ear, it's the best way to fall asleep. a sleep without a nightmare, he protects me, even throughout my rest. the clingy longing for him after he's gone, the hugs I miss so dearly when he's not by my side. our laughs and smiles that I treasure so close, the cute smile and giggle he does when I tickle his sides, the pure happiness that is shown, makes me feel a loving warmth within me, that grows like a flower, making my whole body lift with joy, with a short period of relief from the normal me.
there are so many words to describe him, but none of them would fit perfectly. he is perfect. a super human that understands and doesn't at the same time, but makes sure I'm okay whether he is or not. some sort of stupidity that makes him love me, but still makes me feel important and valued to someone other than family. the good morning messages and sleep well texts, the things that can make my day within a few words. the single sweetness from which a smile can be given to me, even if I just see him smile, his pure precious smile that can bring me to life again. safe and warm, his hugs make me feel so much better about life, and make me smile even when its a goodbye. the boy who can make me cheerful with a few jokes and a tickle, some super human strength to hold the weight of all my problems, the supportive help he gives, making me feel less alone within my battles. the knowing of my mood swings and how to make me feel more grounded, knowing how to bring me back to earth when I zone out, thinking of predictable bad thoughts.
so much love I give to him, my heart that is plastered and shattered is his to own, or to crush at his mercy. the commitment and support I aim to give to you, is nothing compared to the care and attention I will give you in much time to come. the more memories we make, the more happiness that is built, the stronger we will be and the better we will become, as individuals and as one.
i love you snot face, I really do.
and I promise everything your scared of will not happen, what ever it may be. and I promise whatever you wish to be promised will be honoured and kept.
i will always try to be my best for you. no matter if I'm not at my best, I'll always try to be the best me I can be, in front of you, even if I'm not the same me as I am alone.
you'll always be the best to me, the best version of you is any version. you'll always be good enough, better than that even.
you are perfect;
to me you are perfect.
👽
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