who i am.

insight seventyseven you know its back when you type that fully explained message for all the reasons you aren't okay, but delete it and simply type 'im fine', even though you drop you phone and cover you mouth to silence the crying that occurs seconds after you press send. you know its back when you notice yourself distancing your time away from friends and family, snapping back and closing off those walls you tried to so hard to reopen. you know its back when you cant sleep, eat or do anything besides procrastinate and waste your time on things that will never matter. you know its back when you want to scream everything from the top of your lungs but you don't have the energy to. you know its back when you worry about every individual action you take and constantly feel apologetic for being ever so slightly wrong. i don't want to ruin this, i don't want to ruin us, i don't want to ruin me. but i know its back when i just need that one person to wrap t

insight seventysix 8th of September 2018 - s a quick note after an evening of   smiles  :) His fingertips trace my back, inch by inch of my bare skin, as if I let him touch the real mortal soul of mine. breathing close, heartbeats pulse again my chest, a steady rhythm of existence pleasing my every sense, pleasing my smile even brighter to know he's right there beside me. my hand glides over his back, the dip of his spine creating a river to trail down, a slow dance of intimacy and enjoyment. eyes closing again, I lay my head upon his shoulder and smile at our hours in the night spent lying together in a place that curls around me and holds me tight, a place I call home.  - - - he stands taller than me, peaking around my hair as I adjust my clothing, ready to leave for a lonely bed. he smiles and talks of sweet nothings about me, making me smile and feel utterly melted by his adoration and adorable serious tone. turning to face him, he pulls his hand to my cheek and kisses m