8:47


insight sixtythree

touch

i'm now numb 
to your sharp touch
tracing through my skin.
numb to sensations
that travel up my spine
the blank relief 
which once was new
which once supported
me

you touched the blemishes
tallied the cries
you touched the places
no one can see 
yet made them watch me 
alone

- a poem
one day forward 
two days back
smiles and floral 
all turned to black
not noticing how
the laughter died
music so loud
it muffled the cries.

Popular posts from this blog

8:17

insight fiftyeight i haven't written, nor thought about doing so, in a month. i can't say i'm sorry because i'm not, time away isn't always easy but my minds been too full to fathom words on a page, or a screen. my hands shake like an alcoholic yet my alcohol is liquid nerves, worries and unslept nights. my eyes tired, stained black with attempts of beauty that try to hide the layers of sleep deprivation burrowing into my grey skin. my nails bitten within anxious episodes when at school, home or anywhere that caused internal terror in my brain. mind flickers from thought to thought, clockwork timing to circle round and round that same point, the same pin the works that stops me from achieving the full happiness i should feel for upcoming events, and past celebrations. tick tock. tick tock. the thought jitter, mixing into one pile of letter, numbers, like binary code but making no sense. blind to the plain sight of pain inflicted within, the silent torment stopping...
Read more

5:26

insight fiftythree there's a lot of things going on right now. in my head i mean. my life isn't a lot of things, very slow motion rain and black a white music. ... let me set the scene... a candle flickers beside me, close enough so i can feel the heat but not burning my hair black. music rings through my headphones, Supermarket flowers singing my emotions in a comforting sort of way. my phone to the right of my laptop flashes with a notification from a heart breaker, whom for some reason wants to communicate with me. to my left is the rain, trickling slowly down my window, blurring the clouds and bricks together, a typical English autumn day. I've been watching this series, Doctor Foster on BBC. the final episode touched my heart, in a eye opening way. the parents of a young boy, Tom, were fighting and he went through an emotional turmoil of negative feelings. they didn't notice. but i did. i know it's all made up, but i noticed. the pale skin, the sleepless ...
Read more

4:58

insight twentytwo   our angel i remember the first smile you gave me, "wanna sit together on the bus?" you said. a friendship bloomed that morning as the bus left in the foggy sunrise. - i remember you wrapping your arms around me, the delight from that gifted pencil case. a single boost of joy given to me before you left for home. - but i remember the tears running down my face, "she's gone" and my phone hitting the floor. the slow motion running of my mum as screams in pain left my mouth. -  as i remember lying in that empty car park our warm hands intertwined in love. night drawing cold as the stars shine up high and now i can watch you within them. <3 šŸ‘½
Read more