6:42


insight two 
      lets be creative...
Icy air hits my lungs as i step inside my room, lit only by the sinking sun upon the horizon. With tired eyes and weary limbs, i lie on my bed, staring at the plain ceiling for what feels like hours until i hear the birds screaming outside. Another fight between the robin and sparrow keeps me entertained for a few minutes, but all i can think about is sleep. Needing to cleanse my skin, i stare in the mirror at myself, the rough uniform covered in stains of who knows what. Taking off my tie, i gently place on my desk, as if it was important. Tingling sensations run down my spine as i stand in my underwear, facing the mirror, in the frosty cold, wondering who would ever love... this. Opening and closing my eyes as if to awake from a nightmare, i inhale a universe of air and exhale it deeply. Carefully i remove my bra and underwear, sighing at my stretch marks, thinking about how i hate my chest. Untangling my hair from its messy ponytail, i grab my apple hair shampoo, mmm my favourite scent. Testing the spraying water for a hot temperature, i step into the shower, smiling at the silence that surrounds me. Under the warm shower head, i stand still as a statue... thinking. Numbing the pain booming in my head, i wash my brown hair and leave it in a birds nest look as i wash my body. Tracing the soap up and down my long legs, my mind clears of all thoughts, which for me is a gods work. Ideally, I'd scrub over smooth arms and thighs, but that isn't the case. Layering the soap across my stomach and chest, i wish that both were smaller, i wish i could fit in the clothes i wanted. Like most people, i contemplated a lot of things while showering for those short 7 and a half minutes. I step cautiously out the shower, making sure that no one is outside the door, ... watching. Damp and drowsy, i grab a old, worn towel and lap around my body, drying it to a desert. I pull on my lace underwear, dress myself in my black silk dress and slap on some make up. Every inch of me i hate, but im not dressed like this for me, im dressed for him...

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