9:38

insight sixtyone
i guess you don't really understand your dependence, love and reliance on a person until you're apart. the strength of the bond that you need physically yet it's something you take for granted until it's no longer visible. Day to day laughs that are your medicine from the dark, smiles for just seconds that brighten the doomed thoughts. Just a few days, it's less than a week; why should I be bothered? maybe because without you around I feel lost within myself, or the daunting fact that we are two as one but apart, we long to be in each other's company. but it's only a few days right? wrong. mentally, emotionally, I realise how much I lean on you, even if it's not noticeable, to you, to anyone. maybe that's the only reason I like to spend 6 hours of exhausting boredom, because I know I will smile with you for all those seconds I desire. maybe you're a drug, a dose of happiness that no one nor nothing can replace. in the worst of times I know you will be there, standing there, giggling there, waiting there for me. maybe I guess it's knowing I'm wanted by someone, knowing that you care for me as much as I you. i've told you, I could tell you a million times over that I miss you. more than that if I tried. just your smile, you glasses, your eyes that roll when I tell a joke, maybe it's those things I love the most. it could just be a platonic love story meant to bend and flex within worlds apart, or maybe it's fate that two people should share such need for one another's lungs to breath similar air in the same room, in the same time space. even in the certain moments in which my face is buried in a soft duvet, tears melting into the material over the storms within, when i catch a glance of you, framed behind glass to protect us - the mortals, i smile and the slow stops, only for the time until i draw my eyes away. even in those times of pure sadness and despair, your visual presence wraps its arms around me, and wipes away the few petty tears that break away from internal strength. only months, not years upon years have we been friends yet i could tell you stories that last decades of happiness and intimate memories. isn't it strange? friends made years ago remain behind and distant, but within a small space of weeks i spill my entire person for you and all the sweet details that go with it. i guess what im trying to say, not so simply at all, is ...

i miss you <3